If you want to get a man to commit, you need to follow a few rules so that you actually get results. Getting a man to commit is one of the all time big questions that every woman at some point in her life has wrestled with.
It is one of the most common asked questions that I have women ask me when I coach them and the golden rule is:
‘Think pleasure and pain!’
Let me explain what I mean by this.
Suppose you’ve been dating a guy for 4 weeks or so and he tells you he doesn’t want to be exclusive. Perhaps he just tells you he’s not ready to commit.
Let’s go through the specific rules of how to make him want to be in a relationship with you.
RULE No. 1 – Never ever give your man an ultimatum!
A response women often make is to give an ultimatum, in other words they’ll say to the guy that if he does not commit to her exclusively from now on, she is sorry but their relationship is over.
Now this looks like a decent approach, right? – WRONG
If you give a man an ultimatum, he will run a mile every time. By bearing down on him to make an ‘all or nothing’ decision, you will only make him associate pain and stress with commitment.
He will see it as having to resign himself to a relationship, and he’ll romanticize the freedom that he would get being single.
Rule No. 2 – Don’t give him all the benefits of a relationship before he’s committed to one
A guy has to earn is place in your life. What a lot of women make the mistake of doing is giving themselves completely to a guy before he has expressed any intention of committing.
Not only does this apply sexually, but also to how much time they give him. They let him call her up and come over whenever he’s around, they break plans for him, come and look after him when he’s ill, the list goes on….
If you give a guy all these things before you’re even dating he’ll think:
“Why do I need to commit when I can get all this attention and still be single?”
Rule No. 3 – Get him to associate massive pleasure to commitment!
Another mistake women make when men won’t commit is trying to be colder towards him. This is also the wrong response.
Although it’s right that you might want to back off a bit (or even date other men), you want to make sure that whatever time you do spend together is the most fun he could possibly have!
That way when you leave he’ll think: “I want to spend more time with this girl, we have such an amazing time together!”
You always need the guy to realize that every time he commits to you a little bit more, things get more fun, more exciting, more romantic, and more sexy. If you give him everything all at once right away, there’s nothing left for him to achieve by being in a relationship with you.
What you ideally want is for him to feel like the single life can never be as much fun than experiencing new things with you can be.
A guy needs to feel like he’s missing out by not committing to you.
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I generally appreciate your advices Matt. But Im sorry. Didnt like this one much. It seams too much like the old female concocting, working behind the scenes to ensnare a man tactics. “Trick him into behaving like a mature adult”. I dont think every man is alergic to the word “commitment”. And I dont want to convince and manipulate someone to be with me. If you are the kind of guy that wants to play around, then fine. But you are not for me. Im not into converting someone. I want someone that wants to show me that they want me. What happened with openness and honesty? “Im a woman that is looking for a relationship. If you see yourself having a relationship in the not so far away future (with any woman), we can try this and see what happens. If you dont feel it for me, thats fine but atleast we gave it a shot. Btw you seam like a great man and I find you intruiging.” Could it be so wrong?
=)
1. Oh..okay. Well, thank you. I really appreciate you telling me. I really like that you’re so honest.
2. No sorry, I can’t tonight. I have a date. I have some free time next week though. How about Thursday?
3. Talk with passion about all the amazing things going on in your life that he’s missing. Laugh about shared interests. Talk about that fun thing you did together the first or second date you went on. Then go home early – alone. If he’s not commiting to it – he ain’t hitting it.
I don’t think it’s manipulation. It’s getting on with your life and your goal of a relationship and he can either catch up or he can fade away as you find someone more on your wavelength. It’s valuing yourself enough to make him work for it.
Hi everyone i will never forget the help the priest of JAYEMA temple render to me in my marital life. i have been married for 4 years now and my husband and i love each other very dearly . after 3 years of our marriage my husband suddenly change he was having an affair with a lady outside,i notice it then i was praying for divine intervention the thing became more serious i told my pastor about it we prayed but nothing happen. my husband just came home one day he pick up his things and left me and the kids to his mistress outside at this time i was confuse not knowing what to do again because i have lost my husband and my marriage too. i was just checking my mails in the office when i saw someone sharing her testimony on how the priest of JAYEMA temple help her out with her marital problems so i contacted the email of priest JAYEMA i told him my problem and i was told to be calm that i have come to the right place that i should fill some information concerning my self i did after 30 minus he called me again congratulating me that my problems will be solve within 48 hours. he told me what went wrong with my husband and how it happen.that they will restored my marriage but i will make a free donation to their JAYEMA home anything my heart told me. to my greatest surprise my husband came to my office begging me on his knees that i should find a place in my heart to forgive him i quickly ask him up that i have forgiven him.friends your case is not too hard why don’t you give priest JAYEMA a try they work surprises because i know they will also bring back your husband. contact him via jayemamagictemple@gmail.com
I once tried giving my guy an ultimatum, it DID NOT work!
I wonder if there is anyway to “start over” with the same guy? There is a man who has been in my life for almost a year. When we first met, I didn’t think much of it and “gave him the goods” before we were even dating. He stuck around and we started going on date-type outings even though he had mentioned he wasn’t looking for a girlfriend. Four months after we met I was moving out of state. He made my last weekend amazing. Then all of a sudden I had to stay in the state last minute. After that we slept together once but then we stopped doing that. Now we communicate every day and see each other 2-3 times a month. He hasn’t gotten the goods in over six months yet he shows me in many ways he is into me (proximity, physical touch, shares information, helped me move and helps in other ways). Yet….here I am still single and find myself wondering how much longer I should stick around? Did I unknowingly put myself in the friend zone?
my guy broke up with me over a silly misunderstood text that had no real meaning in it. care alot for him and it’s his birthday in few days,should i still drop him off the present i have bought for him.
Hey how can I make a guy run after me? Here’s the thing a guy is now courting me but its like he is switching our places its like im the one courting him, but im not, he switches his place and my place..
Ps.
Please help me im having a hard time dealing with this..
Antoinette, that post was a year ago and I hope you’re already over that guy. Anyway pls don’t ever chase a man. If a guy’s not interested, fine, u can meet a better man who will treasure u. Good luck
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hi i have resd the above and it makes sense. but i think my case a little different i have a kid to a man 15years ago. and since then i had a few relationships and he had settled down and had more kids..even tho this was all happening he always came to see me and everytime i was in a relationship he called and i always ended it so i could be with him when he called. he always foned wen he was out a night at the pub. now he has split up with his gf and we have been togeather but he says he doesnt want to commit altho he is the first person i speak to in the morning and the last at night and when the fone is engaged he asks whos on the fone. he knows i love him i told him but he has never told me. i know he wants me i just dont know if he loves me or is committed to me in anyway. all messages would be grateful.
First of all, Am just short of words i don’t know what to say, am so grateful to Dr aduga for what he has done for me. At first i thought he was a scam like two others that i worked with, but i just decided to contact him then he told me that my lover will be back home within 4days. When the 4 days completed my husband called me and said he was sorry for the frequent argument and fight, i was so happy that my husband who left me for over 2 years called me. Now we are together he can’t do without me, he always wants me to be by his side and he just bought me a new car. If you want to contact him for help, his email is dr adugasolutiontemple@hotmail.com
It was William Smith, a canal surveyor in England around 1800, who first realized that
the same fossils would occur in the same layers of rocks all over England.
They just open their computer and search for sugardaddies.
You should avoid being thought of as clingy or distressed.
After the “talk” don’t they normally dart the other way and never look towards you ever? Going through a completely opposite scenario at the moment – even after the “talk” we are still in contact, as a month progressed I begin seeing things that happened when we first met but randomly. I try not to look desperate by being the only one texting and calling but I don’t want to come off as being cold and rude? Like how much is too much? I don’t know.
I want to say is that dr Sanu made my dreams come true. I was finally asked me out yesterday by the man I thought I lost completely, he said that he wanted me back in his life and that it feels right among so many other things after we both had seperated since july this year. I really loved my boyfriend and had a hard time without him in my life, I am very happy I ever found dr Sanu email online and asked him to help me bring back my boyfriend. I got my boyfriend back after dr Sanu helped me within only 2 days, dr Sanu you are amazing!!! I can’t even begin to tell the world how thankful I am to you!
Dr Sanu email : dr.sanuspiritualtemple@gmail.com
From a guy’s perspective, if he’s not interested in being exclusive after 4 weeks, he’s not likely to be at all. And for those girls whose man came running, it’s the exception, not the rule.
My boyfriend left me three months ago. The longer he’s gone, the more I see what a jerk I was. At first, I blamed him for leaving. I told him he was ‘wrong’. In fact, I slapped scripture on him, trying to guilt-induce him any way I could. My anger only pushed him further away. I can’t believe the way I acted. My boyfriend gave me chance after chance, and I ignored him.
I contacted Dr. Dele from a testimony I saw on a blog and within a few minutes of mailing him, I realized that everything that have been testified about him are through, he was the one person whom I could completely trust. Within 48 hours, my boyfriend is back in my life. I can’t thank him enough so I decided to add my own testimony online for people who need help in restoring back their relationship. You can contact him on dr.delespiritualtemple@gmail.com
Linda Maxwell from USA.
My name faith i want to give thanks and i will always give thanks to Dr ogboni who brought back my love that has left me for 6years within 48hours, i have said about this last week but i promised to always tell people about this every week end so that those that did not read about it last will read about it this week, i have been looking for how to get this boy back to my life because i love this boy with the whole of my heart, i could not replace him with any body,one day i was watching my television when i saw a lady giving thanks to Dr igbalu and telling the world how he helped her i was so shocked i could not believe it because i never taught that there are powers that can bring back lost love, then that was how i decided to contact him too because i do really need my love back,when i contacted him i told him everything and he told me not to worry that my love will surely be back to my arms within 48hours at first i could not believe because i was thinking how could somebody that has gone for 6years come back within 48 hours,so then i decided to watch and see,unbelievable within the next 48hours i got a call from unknown number so i decided to pick the call the next thing i could hear was my loves voice he was pleading and begging me on the phone that i should forgive him that i should forget all that have happened that he did not know what came over him,he promised not to leave for any reason, that he was really sorry for what he did,i was so surprised because i never believed that this could happen,so that was how i accepted his apology and the next morning he came to my house and still pleading for me to forgive him i told him that everything is okay that i have forgiven him, that was how we started again and now we are married, i promised to say this testimony in radio station, commenting this testimony is still okay but before this month runs out i promise to say this in radio station and i will,sir thank you very much.World please am begging you people to try and thank this man for me,or if you need his help here is his email address:ogbonispelitemple@hotmail.com , you can still contact me through my email to know more about him.this is my email adress:ogbonispelitemple@hotmail.com.
Name:faith
Country USA
What a beautiful and wonderful testimony some
time things you don’t believe can just happen. My
name is santo cruiz, from uk am 26 years old i got
married at the age of 25 i have only one child and i
was living happily .After one year of my marriage
my husband behavior became so strange and i don’t
really understand what was going on, he packed out
of the house to another woman i love him so much
that i never dream’s of losing him, i try my possible
best to make sure that my husband get back to me
but all to no avail i cry and i cry seeking for help i
discussed it with my best friend and she promise to
help me he told me of a man called Dr baba, he is
a very great man and a real man that can be trusted
and there is nothing concerning love issues he
cannot do that is why they call him Dr baba. I
contacted his email address at
( okutemple@hotmail.com) And i told him
everything that happen all he told me is that i
should not worry that all my problems will be solved
immediately. He told me what to do to get my
husband back and i did, he said after 3days my
husband will come back to me and start begging, it
really happen i was very surprise and very, very
happy our relationship was now very tight and we
both live happily again. So my advice for you now is
to contact this same email
address:okutemple@hotmail.com, if you are in
any kind of situation concerning love issues and any
other things that give you problems. THANKS
I don’t no he love me or not. He speed many time at my place and I don’t no where he stay. But he do everything for u. He say her ex live in de house. So he told me tht he has bond house. So he staying with his brother
Pls help me. My boyfriend do every thing for me. I can’t walk but he is de one who help me with everything even to take my son at school. I have a year together I can visit his mother and he no my family. But de problem is I don’t no where he stay tht thing I f I starterd thing about it I cant sleep. He is de one who also pay for me housing and medical aid. And buy cloth for my boy and my son is on ritalin. He is de one who pay for it. And I don’t want to loose him. He meantion tht next is must finish de school. Am confuss I don’t understant him. Pls wht must I ask him sotht I can go where he live. He mention tht he stay with brother idont no him. I no his mother and sister only de family. Am stressed
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3 Steps To Make a Man Love You