There will come a time in your relationship with the guy your sure is ‘The One’ when you want nothing more to take the next step, get engaged and continue the rest of your life with him by your side.
However tradition has it that you have to wait for your man to propose so it seems your destined to become one of those girlfriends that gaze at him meaningfully during your friends weddings, walk painfully slowly past jewellers and ask him what he would call his children.
Well it really doesn’t have to be like this!
I cant stress how important it is not to try these methods of getting your guy to propose
a) A man proposing under pressure will be a man likely to bolt down the aisle on the day, when he realises he wasn’t ready.
b) Pressuring him means he is more likely to bolt before the proposal has taken place as he is feeling like you have been trying to trap him.
Most men do want to marry the woman they love. They do dream of settling down and having children. But it needs to be their idea. They don’t want to be scared by your talk of saving for a big wedding and what age you just start trying for children. As soon as the idea of getting married become something less like its in his control and more like something your threatening him with the less likely it is to happen.
I don’t believe in there being any tried and tested methods of getting your guy to propose as it will only happen and last if its meant to be
But you can help by reminding him how happy you would be together;
1) Carry on having fun together,remind him your the kind of girl he would want to spend the rest of his life with, the girl he can have a laugh with, have great sex with and get silly on tequila with, your not an old married couple yet and you don’t want him to see you that way. Nagging him about going to the pub and spending nights in watching ‘Who wants to be a Millionaire’ will only discourage him.
2) Don’t be afraid to talk about a future that doesn’t see you two getting married, if its the opposite of what he wants it will spur him into proposing. I don’t mean you have to threaten him I mean talking hypothetically about a quite unlikely fantasy future that gets him thinking.
3) Talk about the future in terms of exciting trips abroad or things you would like to achieve together like learning a new language or financial achievements you aspire too instead of discussing mortgages and children.
Remember: He wants to propose to you, the woman he fell in love with, not bridezilla. But catching the bouquet at your friends wedding won’t hurt…
What does it mean when a guy proposes during sex?
It means the sex was good… but thats about it.
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My guy promised he would propose as soon as he clears his dept and he was the one that bought it up first in February….now i am sitting here like an ass waiting…… and the more i see all my friends getting engaged i get more and more depressed… i have been to a physiologist and been put on tablets for depression because of my past but its not working.
oh i forgot… as soon as he was clearing his dept he decided to get a new car…( he has 3 already) my point is dont promise me something i dream for a crush it…. as soon as i get it i guarentee you we wont fight anymore… all the fights are only about that…
Hi girls. I’ve had 4 relationships an all 4 proposed to me and I left them when they did (I’m 20)…
Believe me, sometimes it’s better it takes time so you know it’s worth. I got scared after they done it because I wasn’t ready.
In case you want it anyway I can just give you this advice:
Stay interesting, don’t call him every second he is not there… Keep hygienic, look and smell nice, be funny, don’t show him when you’re in a bad mood, it’s a turn off. If you’re mad show him different, I don’t know…. Go to a friend or just ignore him a little. Have sex with him like its the first and last time, every time. Feel sexy. Just be confident and don’t stress him…. That’s all I can say. Also men love women who take care of them, cook for them and just take a little bit of moms space… Not too much, it’s just men love mom the most but if you can give him the same as his mom and on top be interesting, sexy, smart, funny …. Why should he leave you?
I really know what I’m talking about, all my friends tell me how lucky I am with the men I meet, but I told all of my friends it’s just about how you treat a guy, they’re all built the same… Not much difference. Be cute, when he is! If a man notices he gets your attention when he gives you it, he will never stop.
I hope I was able to help
I hope my English is ok, I’m German :) so hope I wrote understandable.
Kisses
Kelly I’m in your shoes. 4 yrs and still waiting. Got prego. Lost the baby and he is still the same way. I’m thinking to take German girl advice
Ok so now that im ready for the ring it’s taking for ever or hardly bought up anymore. It’s been about 2 years now and we have a 1 child together and another on the way. It was him from the beginning who wanted to propose to me and i never took him serious but now we spend everyday together and have a family I feel it’s my time. He doesn’t bring it up unless he thinks Im upset or i talk about one of my friends getting engaged and now that doesn’t even make him bring it up. I don’t say anything but i really want us to be married. I guess it’s a fairy-tale ending that’s going to take longer than I thought…
Have you considered he don’t want to be I was in the same issue until I told him I was going to move and start my life over with our twins without him and that I could not wait on him to get it I gave him 3 years and it was not easy so I moved and didn’t return any of his calls and when I saw him I pretendEd I was to busy to talk this went on for a month and then one night I went to visit a friend and he was there it was a party and in front of all these people he asked me if would marry him ….you have to miss what you had in order to know how special you are to have it.
Just made 4 years this past Sunday and in still waiting. We use to fight over it. I’m so tired of fighting with him about it. I just said forget about it. No kids. I give him any and everything he could possibly ask for and I asked for a ring nod he goes on I promise we’ll be engaged next year. Don’t know when next year but sometime then if I hadn’t left yet
Maybe you shouldnt give him everything…he should want to take care of you. He’s the man, he’s supposed to be your protector.
Oh my god. Please. It is so sad how women (including me!) are like children waiting for mommy or daddy to give us the candy aka boyfriend proposal. We need to speak up early on in a non confrontational gentle way. EARLY ON. No games. We only live once! If you’re 30, you don’t have much more time!!!!
I share my love with someone an love me so much an one day marry ths years an plan on hve baby n family happy now tha wht ups an tried be with he was make him happy we make love least weeks its was good tired hve family an baby da plan be with him specila valentine day come up an be only on was wont us get married ths years yes da what wont…
Well.. you all seem to have been waiting a while – We have been together for 7 years! yes 7. I have been waiting for 1.5 years. Ok I am only 22 and him 23 (his reasoning “we are too young” really are we? I dont want to have kids right now maybe in 3-4 years and I would like a long engagement +/- 1.5 yrs.. he knows all this ofcourse. We are happy and love eachother. We have lived together for almost 2yrs we have a dog and both have stable jobs and careers going. most of our close friends are still single or in relationships and few are married with kids.. I just dont know what he is waiting for? we have travelled to Europe, Thailand and often go to Mauritius to visit my side of the family. His parents and family are like my own.
My guy and I have been together for almost 7 years; he received my dad’s blessings in 2009. He bought the ring in 2011; we bought a house two months after the ring purchase, but he has NOT proposed yet — it’s 2013. While he’s fully supportive of my career & professional development, it is tiring having to answer to friends’ question of “So, are you engaged yet?” It was a challenge trying to communicate how important it is to me to be officially engaged; technically, we’re already engaged, but ironically, we aren’t.
Just two months ago, he asked me to blatantly put the ring on. It was not even a proposal! He more often than not would reveal his supposed intentions to propose (had we left out of town one weekend) rather than just proposing. We talk about the future and he can’t imagine being with anybody else.
I… however, want to give up hoping and just bury myself further with work. I know I’m supposed to be patient and logical, but it is so frustrating when all the little things I do (such as cooking nice healthy meals and offering back-rubs after long days of work) seem to add up to nothing! :) LOL, I’d be a skeleton by the time he does ask.
Ok. Let’s get the facts untangled here, cuz girfriend, I’m a bit perplexed. Sooooo, wait. He bought a ring and DID WHAT WITH IT?????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Believe it or not that’s important. And, baby, not because of him, but because of you. He bought a ring – brought it home – showed it to you – said it was for you? (I hope) – AND THEN WHAT????????!!!!!!!! You stood in the sidelines biting your nails waiting for Romeo to propose???? See? That’s our mistake right there? You should’ve been offended. WHAT. DID. YOU. SAY? I don’t get it. You are either on the horse or off the horse but you cannot ride the horse’s shadow!!! And that’s what you’re allowing him to do. The minute that piece of jewelry entered the real estate that BOTH OF YOU ARE PAYING FOR you should’ve been able to call your girlfriends and start a fight as to who was going to be the Maid of Honor!!! Give me a break, you allowed him to dangle a carrot before your eyes. Girl!!!!!!!!!! I get it. I do. It’s time to stop the madness. He’s either in or he’s out. And that bit about PUT THAT RING ON???!!! HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND??? Let’s take 10 minutes of sanity here and sit that man down and very coolly ask him WHAT. THE. HELL. DOES. HE. MEAN. by “put that ring on” and if he says anything close to what we are all hoping he says. You will GIVE HIM THAT RING BACK and tell him he has THREE MONTHS to come up with a proper proposal (You deserve it – Please believe that).
You see? Notice, I didn’t say drop him, baby. If you’ve been with him this long, I trust that there are qualities you see in him that none of us can’t ever see. But for the love of Pete!!! Stop being his shoe shiner!!!! You are the woman he loves, make him aware of that! If you don’t, sweetheart, NO-BO-DY will.
GOOD LUCK, and I hope to read about your wedding soon.
Nina
lol at NINA go girl! I agree. Thank you for sharing. The both of you I pray that he proposes!!
yes….me and my boyfriend we known eah other from 4 years
now its goin to be 5 years.we used to have a great sex
and love but he have many things annoying in him,,whiCh are not tallareable for me.and for this we used to have big fights and sometime its like the end of the relationship..anyone tell me what to do
I have been with my bf almost a year. Actually, in three days will be our one year of being together. We love each other a lot and we get along with each others family very well. We do talk about the future together. I just wonder when he will pop the question.
It would be the perfect timing if he proposed on our one year of being together but i doubt that’s gonna happen. I just don’t wanna wait a long time because I’m gonna be 34 next month and I would like to start a family soon… I don’t want to be really old by the time I start my family.
I have been dating my boyfriend for 2yrs now. In january he asked me ” if I would want to spend the rest of my with him and have his kids” ? I said yes, then he was in Croatia and when he got back he got no ring . I tried to discuss the phone proposal and he would talk to me. Is he messing with me? I am so confused!!!!
Talk to him! INstead of the Internet.
3 years and no proposal. Been friends for around 12 yesRs so I’m thinking ok maybe he doesn’t want to get married! It’s important to me and my son that we marry :-/ it’s not his son. Just mine. Although he raises him with me! Just can’t go on like it I’d rather be alone than feel so unwanted! 3 years is long enough to decide if you want to spend the rest of your years with someone? If he doesn’t know yet , he hd no business being with me :(.
I’ve been with my man for 5 years and Im still waiting for a ring!!!!! He says he wants to get married and have children with me and that if he didn’t feel the same as me he wouldn’t be with me. He leads me on though. He will hint that something is going to happen on our dates by telling me to dress up get my nails done because its a special night so I expect it. I get nothing! Our anniversary this year was big 5 years! I spent $600 on the weekend away and he got me nothing!!!!!!!! When my girlfriend asked him when he’s getting me my gift he said he has sized my favourite ring while I was sleeping. Don’t know if I should believe him. I love him and know he’s the one just would like him to sink or swim.
Forgot to mention that for the past few weeks he’s been picking fights with me over nothing and when I ask him what’s wrong he says nothing. He’s been acting really weird too
My boyfriends never even went that far to talk about rings Kristen but if you’re living with him he’s got all he wants either way. Maybe he is just telling you things to string you along. He might be a stringer. Lovers should be fun, hon, if you EVER feel so crazed, you should get out before you’re old and withered!!!! Best of luck!
Thanks Marissa! I’m not even living with him which is my choice he asks all the time to go look at places and I have told him I will move in with him once there is a ring on my finger. I just wish he would do it already I’m tired of arguing with him about it
Hey ladies,
I understand how all of you feel. It’s so nice that us women can all stick together and share one another’s stories. I’m in the same situation as some of you. My boyfriend is 35 and I’m 24, that’s an 11yr age difference but he looks really good for his age. We been together for alomst two years. He is in the army currently in afgahnistan for a mini 6 month deployment. We were living together in hawaii where he was stationed at before he deployed. I went back home to stay with my fam till he gets back and we put all our household items in storage before he deployed. I see him in 4.5 months at the end of october. I keep wondering is he going to propose when he comes back. I think he is afraid of marriage, because everytime i talk about it, he changes the subject. when he brings it up its ok for him to speak on it though and it’s rare when he talks about it. He has two kids from two different relationships, He has never been married. Iv’e never been married and I don’t have kids. We both have good careers. We have a great relationship. He says he is in love with me and he wants to continue our lives together, why is so afraid of marriage, it seems? my friends think he is going to propose when he gets back..but I don’t thinks so.. I see no signs. He didnt do it before he left and i thought he was. If he doesn’t propse by xmas this year, Im doing it to him on new years. Im so in love.. he makes my heart melt and my body tingles with butterflys, dnt know what’s up?
I want to thank Nicole for the post she made on how Dr Adams helped her in bringing back her lover before christmas. At first when i saw the posting i was so happy and in the other hand so scared,That this might not be real, Then i decided to give it a try in which i contacted Dr Adams and told him how my lover left me for another lady for the past 3years and i have been lonely and depressed without him,So i told him if he has helped anyone called Nicole and he said yes, that was the lady he helped in bringing back her lover before christmas. I said good and i told him that if he can help me in bringing back my own lover,He laughed and said once i have contacted him that my problem will be solved. He said that my lover will be back to me within 24hours and do an unexpected thing for me. i said really, Truly when the 24hours was completed i got a text from someone saying am sorry then i decided to call the number i saw it was my lover smith voice. I was so happy he was begging me on phone, That he is ready to do anything that will make me happy in life,So i told him to come over which he did,As he was coming he came with a brand new Car as gift i was so happy and made me had access to his account to prove to me that he is not going to leave me for another lady,Am so happy today and am also thanking Nicole for posting this early. Dr Adams you are truly a man of your word. He can also solve any kind of problems in this world. Friends you can contact Dr Adams on his private Email dradamsjohnsoncentre12@gmail . com
Hi i am kavin, its my first occasion to commenting anywhere,
when i read this paragraph i thought i could also make comment due to this sensible piece of writing.
so now im confused. my boyfriend and i has been together for 2 years. we talked a lot about our lives together in the future and plans on getting married. in fact he is already saving up to be ready for the big day (that is according to him, though i can really see he is keeping money) now my issue was he has not proposed on me yet.. he gave me a ring november last year, that he bought on a local store that was chosen by me but then he just slipped it on my finger and didnt say/ask anything.. should i assume im already engaged with him on that manner? or should i wait until he really pops the question? im so confused.. i still wanna hear him ask me..
Monica, I completly understand, I am going on 5 years not not married.. I got a ring from my guy 6 months after we met. He didnt say anything, it is an engagement ring…. but he didnt propse. Its just a stalling mechanisme. After finding naughty txts messages going back and forth with his ex… I slower just drifter my self awat to stop the thought and pains going through my mind and yet here i am. this was done after being together 3 years its going on 5 soon, and i dont even care to know what he does anymore, because i dont wear that promise ring because its just hurtful and I am not planning on sticking around much longer even though he is trying and i dont know what or who to believe anymore,, there is never a right or wrong time for anything and after having a kid with a guy and not planning my life out ahead of time you quickly realize how short life is to be waiting around for someone that isnt actually scared of commitment,
Monica, I completly understand, I am going on 5 years not not married.. I got a ring from my guy 6 months after we met. He didnt say anything, it is an engagement ring…. but he didnt propse. Its just a stalling mechanisme. After finding naughty txts messages going back and forth with his ex… I slower just drifter my self awat to stop the thought and pains going through my mind and yet here i am. this was done after being together 3 years its going on 5 soon, and i dont even care to know what he does anymore, because i dont wear that promise ring because its just hurtful and I am not planning on sticking around much longer even though he is trying and i dont know what or who to believe anymore,, there is never a right or wrong time for anything and after having a kid with a guy and not planning my life out ahead of time you quickly realize how short life is to be waiting around for someone to not live life and tie the knot.
Vero nailed it on the head with “stalling mechanism.” That is exactly what that is. If I were you I would take it off and only wear it on occasion. You are not engaged. Wearing it at all times will make him feel like hes already got you and doesn’t need to take further action. If you feel it is time then you need to have a mature conversation with him about where he sees the relationship going. In the future don’t take him ring shopping for yourself unless he asks, that’s pressuring.
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