Then there are self-aware decisions about relationships, based on intellectual evidence – which is something I have learnt to do. For instance, I will run a mile from a man, if I find out he’s from a broken home, an only child, and has smoked pot from an early age. (What I will go for, is a man who is nice to me, who reads, whose parents have been together for life, who is not an only child.)

In life, we can make self-aware choices for ourselves, or we can simply react, like a leaf being blown around by the wind, bouncing from one bad pattern from our past, to another.

It’s really unfortunate that some people don’t analyse their own cultural capital for what it is, and repeat it, damage and all, without making better choices for themselves. But that is the way of the world, for a lot of people. For some people, to give up their schemas, is like surrendering the security of knowing who they are and what the world is like – so they cling to them, even when it hurts them. -This is why Lifetraps are so hard to change.